I had a most amazing session with my own life coach on Wednesday. She is excellent at helping me catch my thought processes that might be sabotaging my success in my goals.
Our discussion brought me back to training I attended for my other job as an instructional aide in a Special Ed middle school class. The presenter discussed how students, especially those with behavior challenges like ADHD or ODD, have a hard time feeling successful in their lives because they are so frequently corrected. We ask them over and over again to sit down. Or raise their hand before bursting out an answer. Or stop drumming with your pencil. They really struggle to be successful with these simple tasks.
A key to success, she said, is to give them smaller tasks they will find easier to accomplish. Instead of “sit down,” how about “you can stand, but one hand has to be on your desk at all times.” Instead of “stop drumming your pencil,” how about “drum on your leg instead of your desk because it’s not as loud.”
With these easier-to-accomplish tasks, the students can begin to build a “success streak.” After they build up confidence because of their success, you can start giving them slightly more challenging tasks, and they’ll have the confidence to attempt these tasks and will often succeed at a higher level than before.
We can benefit from the same concept. As my coach and I spoke about one area where I was struggling, she challenged me to change my thinking. When I feel overwhelmed or lonely, I tend to give up on areas of my life where I could be making better choices. I mean, I already sucked at life today. Might as well suck at this, too, right?
Sound familiar? I submit to you, though, that a simple change of mindset can get us out of this funk and making better choices. Find a success streak. Instead of, “I didn’t finish my housework,” how about “I got a good start on my housework.” Instead of “I spent too much time playing Among Us with my kids,” how about “I was really successful about bonding with my kids today.”
Or even, “I got showered today.” “I ate a vegetable with lunch.” “I was successful at putting the ice cream away instead of eating all of it.” Whatever you can do to find your own success streak.
When you can find a success streak, you will realize you CAN continue to make good choices. Then you can finish that housework. Or prepare a good dinner. Or whatever else it is you know you should do but want to give up on.
Are you facing obstacles that minimize your success? Can I help you overcome them? Reach out to me on my “Contact Me” page, and we can set up a free consultation.