Have you seen this picture floating around the internet? It’s an absolute favorite of mine. I saw it on Facebook and loved the message immediately. I thought about how important it is to be aware of patterns of those around us, be it generational patterns within our families, patterns of friends or others who influence us, or patterns we have established within our own lives.
The idea is that when there are patterns that follow you, say a generational pattern of addiction, codependency, or other unhealthy behaviors, if you chose to step away and get the help you need to not follow that pattern, you are protecting those who come after you. These things might be as serious as multi-generational patterns. Or it might be as simple as having a friend who’s really negative and brings out that side of you.
Stepping away from these habits and traditions is hard. It often involves minimizing contact with, or even completely cutting off, people who are influencing you to continue these traditions that are not good for you. That can be especially difficult if it’s a family member like a spouse or parent, or even a coworker you see every day. But when you recognize that these behaviors are unhealthy, it is important to stop them, especially when you are able to see how they might affect those over whom you have influence.
Look at your life and see how those around you are influencing you. What patterns are you carrying on from others? What can you do to minimize that influence? Do you need to change the relationship? Do you need to learn more how to change that behavior in yourself? Do you need to meet with a therapist?
Or maybe a life coach? (Hey, I know a really good one! Click here to email her.) As a life coach, I can help you create a plan to change the aspects of your life you feel are unhealthy. We can look at what patterns are affecting you, and how to overcome them.
I encourage you to break those chains of unhealthy behavior. Not only will you live a more empowered life, but you can influence those that come after you.